I happen to have a kid that is naturally athletic. She plays soccer, does karate and gymnastics. I know this sounds like a lot for a four year old, but I don't force her, and she loves it. I even had to draw the line because she wanted to take dance too. I don't know where she gets it from because I have neither the talent nor the desire for sports. This past weekend was the last game of the season for soccer, and at the end all the coaches for all the teams handed trophies to all the kids. Now at this age, there is no tournaments so there really is no winning teams and loosing teams, but in the older age groups all the kids get them, even if their team never wins a match. Is that fair? I don't really have a decisive opinion on this issues, because I understand both sides. On one hand, my kid is really good and I feel like she should be recognized as special for this, but on the other hand, I would be heart broken for her if she had to see other kids getting a trophy, but she didn't get one. But by giving all the kids trophies what are we teaching them? Are we really preparing them for the realities of life? Are we just setting them up for future disappointments? I really don't know. What do you think?
I'm actually not pro-trophy for everyone. I have a daughter who will undoubtedly be disappointed at some point. She insists on wanting to be first for everything. She's good at a lot of things but she can't be the top at everything. It's not feasible to be perfect and she needs to learn that. She is five and just learning to deal with disappointment. Thankfully, she's young enough that I can guide her through it and I think that's important. Children need to be able to learn to judge their own ability in different areas and improve if they feel they need to. If they don't, that's okay. I think we should be teaching them the trophy is not the be all and end all. I don't think they should all be getting trophies.
ReplyDeleteDisappointment is a part of life. It's painful. But necessary. I'm of the opinion that handing a trophy to everyone sends the completely wrong message.
ReplyDeleteYou don't have to work at all to get one.
We're seeing the same thing in schools. You didn't pass your test? That's okay, you'll pass the grade anyway because we don't want you to be hurt.
But when you get out 'into the world', your boss isn't going to be as lenient. He or she is going to expect results. And no amount of tears are going to help that situation . . .
Wonderful post, Amy!